There's so much that has been flowing in and out of my head throughout this summer. Summer is supposed to be a time for vacations, fun, adventures and lots of sun. When normally these are all things that I am able to enjoy but there's something different about this summer. It's the summer before my 21st birthday and my junior year in college. I'm supposed to be excited about all that right? I can legally drink in a little over a month and I'm getting one year closer to my degree and going off to medical school.
WRONG!
Thought #1: Yes, excitement exists but more pain, agony, fear and uncertainty exists, due to the fact that I'm a young black girl with good grades and I have to spend my summer working every single day to save money to pay for school because the government claims that my parents make too much money for financial aid and my scholarships and loans only cover so much of my tuition. When I'm one of the few who actually wants to go to school constantly and there are people who the government is paying all of their tuition and they skip class constantly. People don't understand and appreciate all their blessings. Not saying that I don't appreciate all of mine even with the thoughts of paying for school on my mind, I still know and understand that at the end of the day it's all in Gods hands and his will.
Thought #2: I will be 21 in a little over a month and I'm still learning and growing every single day! I've learned that the first guy you date and love doesn't always have to end up being your husband. There are other guys out there, guys who have come into their "grown man" role and will treat you like the Nubian queen that you are, they'll take out your trash, wine and dine you and show you just how beautiful you are and how a women should be treated. That you don't need makeup and weave to make you beautiful. But those same guys can still be just as much a douche bag, as said first love. It's all about compromise, understanding, being comfortable in ones own skin and putting God first. Stop looking for Mr.Right and just live your life, you only have ONE LIFE and he will come when the time is right! Also I've learned even more than before that friends come and go and every person that you come in contact with is not meant to be a "friend". Some people are only meant to be in your life for a moment. Learn who those people are and that it's ok to let them go, it leaves room for you to hold on to the people who are meant to stay in your life.
Thought #3: In my two years of attending a historically black university, I've learned to embrace, love, cherish, fight for and rock my "blackness" like no other. The moment I stepped onto Prairie View A&M University's campus, passed by the "Prairie View Produces Productive People" sign, moved in and said goodbye to my family, I knew I was in the right place. I was home! As much as I complain about my school and how it is run nothing like anything other than a "black owned business" I can honestly say I wouldn't want to go anywhere else. I've learned that my people are a strong, supportive, and smart people. Not that my parents and family never taught me these things while growing up...but it is a completely different experience when you are surrounded by 8,000 students that look just like you and you have professors that look just like you as well and whom want nothing but to see you succeed and will do any and everything in they're power to see nothing less. I rock my natural hair, speak my mind without a fear of any white person being offended or apologizing to me for "them making my people suffer" (that's a blog post for another day of its own), and I am able to see all the different shapes, colors and personalities of people who share a mindset and the same amount of melanin as myself. Lol
Well that's enough of my random summer thoughts for tonight. Until another night!
Live your free and one life. Care less, rock big hair, dream more and support it with lots of prayer.
Namaste Beautiful! ✌ ❤ 😊
Signed Black Bohemian Goddess!
