Ending one chapter...Starting a new one

So its been almost a year to the date that I last blogged which is absolutely crazy considering the amount of stuff that has happened since then. I graduated from college with my Bachelors degree, I moved to Virginia and today was my first day of graduate school at Hampton University. Yes another HBCU...I just can't get away from my people. These two years to get my masters are gonna serve as my "Gap Years" between undergrad and medical school. I decided why take a year off doing nothing productive when I could still be in school getting an education and doing what I love, which is learning new things. It's getting me one step closer to Howard Medical School and i'm going through a brand new journey in life. Twenty plus hours away from all of my family and friends and in an entirely new state. So this is not just a fresh start but it's also an exciting yet scary one as well.

There's so many thoughts that are going through my head of what I can and want to do in these next two years and i'm not gonna sit here and list all of them just yet. Let me go write them all down and see how the rest of this first week of grad school goes and then i'll let yall know. (Yes, I can't hide that Texas girl from yall LOL)

Live your free and one life. Care less, rock big hair, dream more and support it with lots of prayer. 

Namaste Beautiful People! ✌ ❤ 😊

Signed Black Bohemian Goddess!

Life reflections

It's the first of September at 4:30am and I'm sitting at work in the ER, with random life reflections starting to happen within my head. I'm just sitting here thinking about my life as a whole and all the things that have been going on lately. Over the summer I had a talk with my parents about how I was unhappy working at Jcpenney where I had worked for almost 6 years, since I was 16 years old and it had been my first and only job. The environment in that place was just changing too much for my liking and it was beginning to trouble my spirit. The management had changed and the people that came in did not care about any of us nor did they appreciate the hard work that we put in to ensure that the store ran efficiently. So after a very emotion conversation with my parents and them telling me that if I don't like a situation then only I had the control to change it, then I began my search for my next job and it had to be something that I felt like would help to contribute to my education and my pursuit in becoming a neurosurgeon. So after many applications and job offers I finally was offered a position at one of the hospitals near my university working in the ER as a unit secretary. It was a blessing and I was greatly appreciative, so I took it as an opportunity and took the position. After taking the position I decided not to quit my job at jcp right away until I got used to the hospital and knew that I would want to stay, plus it was hard letting go of the first and only job I had work for almost 6 years of my life. It was still summer time so I had time to work both jobs. But then as time went on and the summer came to a close shit started getting even worse at jcp and I just said forget them and finally put my resignation in because I felt like I had served my time, worked hard and was unappreciated and also I didn't need that job anymore for the mediocre pay that I was receiving to be treated like complete and total shit. So that was a decision that I felt like was made for the best.

Last week was first week of my senior year in undergrad and from being in summer school and seeing all the things that had taken place before the fall semester even started I could tell that this was going to be an interesting school year. I moved off campus and got my own apartment by myself, I'm taking some of the most difficult classes of my undergrad career, I'm balancing working weekend night shifts at hospital while being a full time student, I'm running most of the organizations in my department and all while trying to focus on keeping my eye on the  prize which is GRADUATION in May. But all in all I will be starting and ending this last year with a bang.

Some of the random thoughts that have gone through my mind this morning were the fact that I am still working on accepting the fact that I'm not in a relationship but at the same time I have no real desire to be in a relationship right now, because no one seems to be of interest to me. Everyone is either boring, childish, not my type, etc., there are just too many wrongs and not enough rights at this moment. I think it's partly because I'm focusing on me finally, which is the always a great thing, and it's partly because I have no reason to worry about when the next person is going to come into my love life, because when God feels it fit the will send him my way.

Throughout everything that has been going on lately, my faith has been greatly strengthened and my focus on myself as well. 

I don't know exactly where I will be at this time next year but what I do know is that all I can do is take it day by day and give it my all.

Live your free and one life. Care less, rock big hair, dream more and support it with lots of prayer. 

Namaste Beautiful! ✌ ❤ 😊

Signed Black Bohemian Goddess!

I CAN NOT be defined

So I know it's been a minute since I last said anything but wow has it been a rough couple of months. I just wanted to focus on getting through my junior year and let me just say I MADE IT!! 

Senior year, graduation and real life all comes next year. I'm officially going to be in the real world one year from now. Yes it is kind of scary but at the same time I'm super excited for it. I've learned so much in the past year, seen a lot, and longed for so much more. I have so many dreams and aspirations. I want don't want to miss out on anything in these young adults years of mine and I don't want to have any regrets. 

It's the year of 22 for me and I have so much planned. I want to see the world before I settle down and get married, I want to try new things and experience things that people only long for or see in films. Fluent Spanish, play the guitar, play piano, paint, take pictures, write poetry and go to a poetry lounge and just be around people with nothing but cool vibes surrounding them, I want to go to the local Caribbean festival, explore Europe, Safari through all of South America, experience Carnival, go the Colombian festival, change my eating habits and my way of life. Wow! A girl can really dream eh. But this girl is not just dreaming, she plans on putting these things into action.

You're probably wondering how the hell does this full time college student, who's supposed to be going to medical in a year plan on doing any of this. Well guess what we're both wondering the exact same thing, the only difference is I don't have any doubts that it's completely possible.

I've come to the conclusion that medical school may not be something that happens right away and I've said that a year off is completely acceptable if need be. I can get a masters in biopsychology or I join the peace corps and help impact lives.

I feel like there is no real limit to what I can and can not accomplish. I CAN NOT BE DEFINED. My individuality and my freedoms will not allow me to be constricted or confined into a world that is only selfish about themselves. I want to  be able to aid others, while making sure that putting myself first is a must. I can never completely care for someone else if I don't care for myself properly first. I have to love myself for me,enjoy being with myself, enjoying my own company and being able to laugh with myself. I have stopped longing for a boyfriend and learned to really enjoy ME. I'm slowly learning to let everything go and hand to all over to God because he's the one who has control over it all. I can't worry myself, if I can not "truly" control anything. Let things fall as they may and just live my one life.

I've recently found my love for the little things that I did when I was younger, Mother Earth, the sky, the plants, the birds, all animals, reading a good book, enjoying a soothing bubble bath. It truly is the little things that keep me happy. 

I know that I WILL be a succesful neurosurgeon with a specialty in surgical neuro-oncology. Saving lives, finding cures, having a wonderful family and putting smiles on a different persons face everyday. At the end of my life I want to be able to say I lived a prosperous and enjoyable life.

That's just a little bit of the things that flow throughout this ever flowing mind of mine. I'll make sure to keep blogging throughout this summer. 

Live your free and one life. Care less, rock big hair, dream more and support it with lots of prayer. 

Namaste Beautiful! ✌ ❤ 😊

Signed Black Bohemian Goddess!

Natural hair, piercings, tattoos and fashion....

All these things are a way to express ourselves and show our individuality. 

Starting with our hair, it can vary from big to small, kinky to curly, long to short, curly to straight. It's very versatile, strong and full of life. It symbolizes our uniqueness culture and it can't be duplicated.

Then we move on to piercings, tattoos and fashion. These things in combination can all symbolize your own individuality from others and allow you to express who you are as a person. Piercings and fashion,  i.e the clothes you choose to wear, can all be linked back to African, European, Native American and many other cultures. In some places these things can represent your status, tribe and many other things. Your tattoos can have specific meanings and values to you, their placement, color, the way they're written can all represent something. Piercings  and fashion can represent your personality.

At the end of the day your hair, piercings, tattoos and fashion show who you are! 

Be free. Live your one life. Care less, rock big hair, dream more and support it with lots of prayer!

Namaste beautiful people! ✌❤

Signed Black Bohemian Goddess!

...and it all begins

There's so much that has been flowing in and out of my head throughout this summer. Summer is supposed to be a time for vacations, fun, adventures and lots of sun. When normally these are all things that I am able to enjoy but there's something different about this summer. It's the summer before my 21st birthday and my junior year in college. I'm supposed to be excited about all that right? I can legally drink in a little over a month and I'm getting one year closer to my degree and going off to medical school. WRONG!

Thought #1: Yes, excitement exists but more pain, agony, fear and uncertainty exists, due to the fact that I'm a young black girl with good grades and I have to spend my summer working every single day to save money to pay for school because the government claims that my parents make too much money for financial aid and my scholarships and loans only cover so much of my tuition. When I'm one of the few who actually wants to go to school constantly and there are people who the government is paying all of their tuition and they skip class constantly. People don't understand and appreciate all their blessings. Not saying that I don't appreciate all of mine even with the thoughts of paying for school on my mind, I still know and understand that at the end of the day it's all in Gods hands and his will. 

Thought #2: I will be 21 in a little over a month and I'm still learning and growing every single day! I've learned that the first guy you date and love doesn't always have to end up being your husband. There are other guys out there, guys who have come into their "grown man" role and will treat you like the Nubian queen that you are, they'll take out your trash, wine and dine you and show you just how beautiful you are and how a women should be treated. That you don't need makeup and weave to make you beautiful. But those same guys can still be just as much a douche bag, as said first love. It's all about compromise, understanding, being comfortable in ones own skin and putting God first. Stop looking for Mr.Right and just live your life, you only have ONE LIFE and he will come when the time is right! Also I've learned even more than before that friends come and go and every person that you come in contact with is not meant to be a "friend". Some people are only meant to be in your life for a moment. Learn who those people are and that it's ok to let them go, it leaves room for you to hold on to the people who are meant to stay in your life.

Thought #3: In my two years of attending a historically black university, I've learned to embrace, love, cherish, fight for and rock my "blackness" like no other. The moment I stepped onto Prairie View A&M University's campus, passed by the "Prairie View Produces Productive People" sign, moved in and said goodbye to my family, I knew I was in the right place. I was home! As much as I complain about my school and how it is run nothing like anything other than a "black owned business" I can honestly say I wouldn't want to go anywhere else. I've learned that my people are a strong, supportive, and smart people. Not that my parents and family never taught me these things while growing up...but it is a completely different experience when you are surrounded by 8,000 students that look just like you and you have professors that look just like you as well and whom want nothing but to see you succeed and will do any and everything in they're power to see nothing less. I rock my natural hair, speak my mind without a fear of any white person being offended or apologizing to me for "them making my people suffer" (that's a blog post for another day of its own), and I am able to see all the different shapes, colors and personalities of people who share a mindset and the same amount of melanin as myself. Lol

Well that's enough of my random summer thoughts for tonight. Until another night!

Live your free and one life. Care less, rock big hair, dream more and support it with lots of prayer. 

Namaste Beautiful! ✌ ❤ 😊

Signed Black Bohemian Goddess!