It's the first of September at 4:30am and I'm sitting at work in the ER, with random life reflections starting to happen within my head. I'm just sitting here thinking about my life as a whole and all the things that have been going on lately. Over the summer I had a talk with my parents about how I was unhappy working at Jcpenney where I had worked for almost 6 years, since I was 16 years old and it had been my first and only job. The environment in that place was just changing too much for my liking and it was beginning to trouble my spirit. The management had changed and the people that came in did not care about any of us nor did they appreciate the hard work that we put in to ensure that the store ran efficiently. So after a very emotion conversation with my parents and them telling me that if I don't like a situation then only I had the control to change it, then I began my search for my next job and it had to be something that I felt like would help to contribute to my education and my pursuit in becoming a neurosurgeon. So after many applications and job offers I finally was offered a position at one of the hospitals near my university working in the ER as a unit secretary. It was a blessing and I was greatly appreciative, so I took it as an opportunity and took the position. After taking the position I decided not to quit my job at jcp right away until I got used to the hospital and knew that I would want to stay, plus it was hard letting go of the first and only job I had work for almost 6 years of my life. It was still summer time so I had time to work both jobs. But then as time went on and the summer came to a close shit started getting even worse at jcp and I just said forget them and finally put my resignation in because I felt like I had served my time, worked hard and was unappreciated and also I didn't need that job anymore for the mediocre pay that I was receiving to be treated like complete and total shit. So that was a decision that I felt like was made for the best.
Last week was first week of my senior year in undergrad and from being in summer school and seeing all the things that had taken place before the fall semester even started I could tell that this was going to be an interesting school year. I moved off campus and got my own apartment by myself, I'm taking some of the most difficult classes of my undergrad career, I'm balancing working weekend night shifts at hospital while being a full time student, I'm running most of the organizations in my department and all while trying to focus on keeping my eye on the prize which is GRADUATION in May. But all in all I will be starting and ending this last year with a bang.
Some of the random thoughts that have gone through my mind this morning were the fact that I am still working on accepting the fact that I'm not in a relationship but at the same time I have no real desire to be in a relationship right now, because no one seems to be of interest to me. Everyone is either boring, childish, not my type, etc., there are just too many wrongs and not enough rights at this moment. I think it's partly because I'm focusing on me finally, which is the always a great thing, and it's partly because I have no reason to worry about when the next person is going to come into my love life, because when God feels it fit the will send him my way.
Throughout everything that has been going on lately, my faith has been greatly strengthened and my focus on myself as well.
I don't know exactly where I will be at this time next year but what I do know is that all I can do is take it day by day and give it my all.
Live your free and one life. Care less, rock big hair, dream more and support it with lots of prayer.
Namaste Beautiful! ✌ ❤ 😊
Signed Black Bohemian Goddess!
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